I stare at my phone next to me.
"Should I send it?" I thought to myself over and over again. It was quite a dilemma. One part of me says, "You need to tell him!"; another part says, "No! Stop!! You will scare him away! You don't want to lose him like this!"
Ugh! It is so frustrating. I want all this to end soon. I look at the time on my phone. 8.14 a.m. Oh my god! Why am I even awake so early on a Sunday? I seriously need to end this...
I end up sitting there, staring at my phone again... Well, you never know if you never try, right? So after gathering much courage, I finally picked up the phone and start typing a text. A long one.
I don't dare to expect anything, so I just click send before I started to change my mind about it. I waited for the reply. One minute, two minutes.
After around 15 minutes of waiting, I realize he is not going to reply any time soon. I expected it to be that way... But still, one part of me felt disappointed.
I guess I did hope him to reply my text. But right now it seems pointless... Maybe I really did scare him away.
Feeling a little down, I slowly get out of bed and head to the bathroom to freshen up myself. I look at the mirror and tried to make a smile on my face but it won't work. Not on me today.
************************************
Why did I became like this? Or should I say since when did I started becoming like this?
I sat down and started to think about it. About him...
My name is Hello Kitty. The tall, awkward and cheeky Chinese girl. I made friends with almost everybody. And one of them is him, Rillakuma.
Rillakuma is tall but not exactly consider tall for a guy because he is almost the same height with me if we stand together. Maybe slightly taller. I don't know.
He has tanned skin. Hmm... Why wouldn't he? He is a pure blooded Malay guy after all. He is quiet from the outside but extremely psychotic from the inside. Well, I can say I knew him long enough to know this much.
My first encounter with him wasn't really all that pleasant. It was in fact a little scary, atleast from my perspective.
Back then, Rillakuma is really weird. You know in tuition classes, there's always alot of place for you to sit in and this guy, he always sits at the same spot at the corner. Its like that spot says, "Rillakuma's spot! Stay out!"
But thats not the only reason why I consider him as weird. Rillakuma has this thing around him. Its like a shield against the strangers or people that he don't know. It seems more like a dark aura chasing people away to me though. I remember I used to tell myself, "Let's not talk to him unless necessary."
I guessed its pointless telling myself that. We have the same range of friends in the class and I knew up to some point, maybe one of us will start talking to the other person. And it did happen.
On one of my peaceful day at tuition, I felt it as if someone was staring at me and more importantly, I thought he was staring at me. "Nah!! I'm just imagining things.." I said to myself.
I thought I might as well assure myself about it so I secretly take a glimpse at him and our eyes met for a split second. I look away, trying to hide the fact that I sneak a peek at him and continue talking with my tuition friends. And then another friend call out for me.
"Hey, Kitty. He wants to talk to you."
"Who?" I asked, feeling puzzled at the moment. My friend points out at him and my eyes widened.
Rillakuma look at me and smile. Being still in shocked mood, the only thing I manage to do is smile too. And then he start talking, "Hey, you are... Right? I heard..... That you... "
I couldn't quite hear what he said as we are sitting quite far away from each other. Maybe he figures that out too when I just stare at him being so confused. And then it happen.
That guy actually stood up from his spot and walk all the way to sit in front of me. I was stunned. It was really funny though now that I remember it again. My inner thoughts at that moment was literally having some serious conversation.
"Oh my god.. Why is he sitting in front of me?!"
"He just wanted to talk, calm down.."
"About what? I don't remember we have anything in common to talk about..."
"Just calm down for god sake!! Its not like he's going to eat you up!"
"Did I do something wrong? Seriously why would he want to talk to me?!"
As my inner thoughts run wild thinking about useless things, the only thing I manage to blurt out is...
"Hi.."
Oh damn! That was awkward...
Rillakuma laughed a little and said,"Haha... Hi. We never talked with each other before, huh?"
I nodded a little and said,"So, what was it that you wanted to talk to me again?"
"Oh that," he says,"I was just asking is it true you like drawing too? Because I heard from Keropi that you draw.."
As he stare at me with those bright excited eyes, how could I say no. So, I slightly avert my eyes and nodded twice.
His face instantly glow up. Excitedly he said,"Really?! Then next time if you have anything about drawing and can you let me see it?"
"Sure."
"Awesome! Sorry if I scare you, it really rare to find friend who draw so I was really excited when I knew you draw too. So yay! Next time can share opinion with each other," he continues.
So, that's how we started talking to each other. And he wasn't that scary after all. I think I can get along well being his art friend. :)
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